Oh Lord it’s hard to be humble. When you’re perfect in every way. I can’t wait to look in the mirror. Cause I get better lookin’ each day. To know me is to love me. I must be a hell of a man. Oh Lord, it’s hard to be humble. But I’m doin’ the best that I can. For Mac Davis this might be true, but maybe not the rest of us.
Most of us, or all of us, have things we don’t like about ourselves, we are not smart enough, not good looking enough or probably have body hang ups. We are too short, too tall, have big feet or big ears… it could be anything really. Most of it though, is not really noticeable to others. Perhaps you are feeling fed up with challenges or how you handle them. Maybe the way you approach a solution when shyness or shame sets in. Your mom loves you, so you are great the way you are! Does that help? It might, studies show that positivity is key.
The power of positive thinking
“A positive mindset brings positive things.” – Philipp Reiter.
A personal favorite of mine is: “Positive anything is better than negative nothing.”- Elbert Hubbard.
Positivity is highly important. Visualization also helps. Imagine the very best version of yourself. Imagine you are the expert. One thing I always wanted since childhood was to be an expert, the go-to person. I happened to be good at a lot of things, but not the expert. My dad would say that he was a “Jack of all trades, master of none.” I felt this way for most of my life. This phrase is sometimes used as an insult, however, the full phrase from William Shakespeare “a jack of all trades is a master of none, but oftentimes better than a master of one.” Is actually a compliment.
In reality, it is just a figure of speech used in reference to a person who has dabbled in many skills, rather than gaining expertise by focusing on only one. To be a true expert, it is probably true that one must spend an exorbitant amount of time on one task. Look at Tiger Woods or the Williams sisters in sports, they lived their sport from adolescence to adulthood to become great.
It came clear to me later in life, that I had a lot of different interests, skills and abilities that gave me expertise. I focused my efforts on many different things, so not being an expert in only one thing was not an encumbrance on my life. Having experience, interest and insight on many subjects was enough, I didn’t have to have a huge ego and be world-renowned on any single subject area to have expertise and feel good about myself. I’m now positive about my thought process. I’m positive that I am good enough to speak on subjects that I have researched and have interest in. I don’t have to be too perfect.
To Strive for Perfection?
Everyone has flaws, but they may not always be physical. Striving for perfection can be both a motivator and a distractor. According to Mel Schwartz, a Licensed Clinical Social Worker (L.C.S.W), in an article from Psychology Today, he referenced treating an increased numbers of individuals who were driven to distraction in their pursuit of perfection. Their desire to be perfect both trapped and burdened them, and imprisoned them with unrelenting stress, often creating havoc in their relationships.
People who strive for perfection can often be stifled, scared to put their thoughts and opinions out there for fear that what they present may not be the absolute best in the world, or the absolute smartest comment or idea. Everyone has flaws. To quote Mr. Schwartz, consider the expression “I’m just human.” He states that humans are not machines that are made to operate as perfectly as possible. As even over time, machines tend to wear down and require repair. Being stuck on striving for perfection can have lasting consequences. We might end up not seeing ourselves as good enough. And in fact, nobody may be good enough for you.
If one actually achieved perfection, they would probably be irritating to the rest of us. Per Mr. Schwartz, perfectionists tend to think that other people are somehow better or superior to them, so they need to be without flaw just to catch up. This is a terribly damaging myth. Again, it is better to focus on the positive rather than the negative. What are the positive aspects of what you have achieved or positive traits of your loved one?
What is your legacy on this earth?
Not everyone needs to make a statement. It is true that most men contemplate their legacy later in life. Did they have children to carry on the family name? To leave a legacy means to leave the places you worked, where you go, or have owned with a lasting memory behind. Some say legacy is to leave the people you meet and the places you have been a little better than you found them. Many men will likely say that their children are their greatest legacy, after all you got married and had children. They should reflect on your values or have gained from your achievements and finances.
This is also true for many women, especially today as there are more women that are centered on careers and out working in today’s society. As housewives they earned, and only sometimes received credit for how their children were raised, and how their children became the wonderful adults they became later in life. Women always cared about their children for sure, but more and more have legacy concerns. They may think about their purpose in life daily within and outside of their work. Some have always wanted to help create positive change in their immediate communities or in communities abroad lacking access to basics like clean water. Maybe they want to leave something behind for their children or grandchildren and have to do it on their own.
Consider the single mother who has primary care for the wellbeing to include the financial burdens. She has to bring home the bacon and fry it. Men and women are not so different that they want to be remembered. Maybe you desire to leave a huge fortune behind. But sometimes, it is just the simple things that matter.
It’s not really important what you achieved, it’s important that you tried. It’s important that you showed the way through positive thinking.
I do believe in the power of positive thinking.. Most of the worlds issues are just a mental exercise and a challenge to overcome. The willingness to tackle them head on and not procrastinate goes a long way towards resolving them. The mind is a terrible thing to waste, which is what it will do if not used.